Comedy/Mystery (1960)
A dingy basement room with (off) a kitchen and a toilet with a deficient cistern that rarely flushes. There is a closed serving hatch between two beds. Dimwit Ben is on one, oaf Gus is on the other. They are killing time, Ben reading odd bits out of the newspaper. They make small talk about tea, food and soccer, speculate about the place they're in, what the 'upcoming assignment' is, and when - if at all - Wilson will be along to fill them in. An envelope is slid under the door but there is nothing in it. Gus gets a revolver from under a pillow, opens the door and looks out. Nobody there.
After a while there is a clattering behind the serving hatch. Gus and Ben grab their revolvers but it is only a 'dumb waiter', a box held by pulleys. There is a piece of paper ordering two braised steak and chips, two sago puddings, and two teas without sugar. A succession of orders requiring various dishes, none of which they can provide, so they send what they can, such as crisps, biscuits and an Eccles cake.
Gus discovers a speaking tube which he uses to apologise to whoever is upstairs that they haven't anything left. He listens, and then apologises for the food they'd sent up being defective.
They rehearse how they're going to handle the job: they are hit men. They quarrel. The whistle blows in the speaking tube. Ben answers and receives some instruction about a man about to come in; the normal method to be employed. But Gus has gone outside to get a glass of water. Ben calls for Gus who staggers back into the room stripped of his jacket, waistcoat, tie, holster and revolver. He raises his head and they stare at each other for a long time in silence.
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